November 2024: GRATITUDE
Image by Nick M.W. (FFP)
The year winds down as the celebrations turn up.
This is the season of “gratitude” which is not the same as Thanksgiving. That’s the term for the holiday that celebrates Indigenous People’s genocide, not togetherness, so we show gratitude rather than give thanks. Yet, I fall into old habits and often refer to the final Thursday in November by its name of horror. I realize that this reeks of cynicism. If you knew me, you would be convinced that it is, but I promise you that I am not being cynical. My point is not about the label of the term; it’s about the end of the year as marked by the holiday season kickoff. Thanksgiving, Day of Gratitude and Food, Friendsgiving, Family Gathering, whichever term you give the last Thursday in November, when you spend extra time and money to prepare an extravagant meal of baked, fried, or roasted bird flesh (and in our case pig flesh, too), or maybe you are in a strict relationship with Tofurkey, however it is that you celebrate this day, I hope it’s with at least one other person you love and who serves that love right back at you.
Time is the enemy. Time is a gift.
Nuptials
My youngest brother got married on November 23rd, in Queens Creek, Arizona to his longtime girlfriend in a small backyard ceremony. Our side of the family was light on representation. Pops was indeed a bit of a rolling stone, so he has nine kids spread out across four decades. Sounds crazy, but it’s true. The 1960s, 70s, 80s, and 90s all saw at least one Williams child born. Hall of Fame shit. Or, Hall of Shame, depending on when you were born. My older siblings got a different version of our dad than I did and for sure the youngest did. Pops was around for most of youngblood’s childhood and had far more interaction with him on a day-to-day during those formative years than any of us other kids did. As a result, I believe our dad felt particularly close to his youngest, his namesake. He would have been thrilled to see him get married and see how far he’s come in his young life. Kid has barely cracked into his 30s and is on track to have the best decade of his life so far.
Dad is gone, but he was there at the wedding last weekend. He was there in spirit, two framed pictures of him were at the couple’s table, with an opened Heineken bottle standing at attention by his side. He was there in the stories I heard from a couple of old timers who knew him back in the day when he lived in Chandler. He was there in the form of three of his boys, standing tall and proud together for the first time since they were together to memorialize him two springs ago. It was a beautiful night.
Congratulations to the newlywed Williams!
Food and Family
Family before food, but I’ll be damned if there aren’t times when the latter is put before the former. You feel me.
Thanksgiving was two days ago. We hosted. We’ve hosted since we moved into our current home, eight years ago. Some people cringe when I tell them that we celebrate this holiday at our house because of, you know, the mess, the noise, the stress. Those are legit reasons to not open your doors to your loved ones, but I see it as a blessing to be able to do it. We get between 15 and 20 people every year, a number that is pushing closer to 20 now that some of my nieces are bringing their boyfriends with them. My wife absolutely loves hosting, and I love seeing her happy. She works her ass off and delivers a beautiful meal, supplied with some sides from her dad and siblings. I help out with the bird, but wifey does the heavy lifting in the kitchen.
The meal is the star of the show, but the memorable moments are the games we play (Left, Right, Center is a new tradition) and the laughs we share. I especially love seeing my kids kick it with their cousins. These moments are fleeting. Another one just passed us by this year. We won’t have many more together like these. Old folks, we know what eventually happens. Families grow. Holidays change. Time is the enemy, and yet everyday is a gift.
Saturday Night Special
I started making 5-minute videos on YouTube. It ain’t much, but it’s an honest few minutes of “work”. Here’s the latest video.
