Nick M.W., Writer by Night

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Quiet House, Lonely Soul

First steps of a long journey.

It was a busy week last week. My wife and I have two kids. Our daughter is seven, and our son is four. On August 2nd, the ladies of the house returned to school and work, which for my wife is at the same school our daughter attends (my wife is a teacher there). Last Monday, August 9th, our son started preschool. We were excited for him to get going in school and learn some new things and, maybe, just maybe, make a friend. We were also nervous for him, especially the first couple of days of school, because he’s autistic, and he has a lot of trouble expressing himself through language. He’s good with making small requests, two or three-word phrases, like “please open,” but he can’t yet tell you if something is bothering him or explain to you what he’s doing. If he’s in a new place, like a classroom, with unfamiliar people, like his teachers would be to him on the first couple days of school, he could have himself a moment and breakdown, and he wouldn’t be able to explain why or confirm to his teachers that he understands who they are and where he’s at.


If you have an intellectually diverse child, you might be able to relate to this type of anxiety.

Well, my worries were for nothing, which is a lesson I should’ve learned by now, but I can be an over-thinking fool at times. Our concerns were eased when my wife and I had a chance to visit the school, meet the principal and our son’s new teacher, and get a tour of the campus. That school has great resources and seems to be well run. We’re lucky that he was placed here because of the specific services he can receive. Plus, it’s right around the corner from our house. Can’t beat that location.

I meant to write about this last week, but like I said, it was busy. Never mind that our daughter caught a cold after her first week. Fortunately, in this day and age, it wasn’t what it could’ve been, but it was enough of a cough, cold, and mild fever (only lasted a day) to keep her out of school for the week, per protocol. She recovered quickly and was back to her normal self by mid-week. Then, of course, our son got sick. He had the same symptoms as his sister, and recovered just as quickly, but the damage to my work time had been done.

Anyone else here working from home while also taking care of their kiddos? It’s not ideal. Even after 15 months of this situation, it hasn’t gotten any easier, and I haven’t caught a damn break. Thought I was going to have everyone out of the house by the time school started, but “nooooo,” we couldn’t have that now. In the before times, kids rarely missed school because of a cough or the sniffles. That crap won’t fly now. I get it. I’m just bitching about spending close to a year and a half working from home and not once having a lonely, quiet house in which to work.

The silver-lining is that I’ve been able to spend a lot of quality time with my family throughout the dark days of the COVID peak in our area and around the world. Not the case with a lot of folks, so please don’t misconstrue this as a general complaint about working from home. I loved it, but I would’ve liked a few days to myself, to work in peace and quiet, to not have to rock noise-cancelling headphones and loud music to drown out the serenade of silliness that pours from my kids’ lips, to not take a midafternoon break to review classwork, to not have to make all those damn lunches. Now that the distractions are gone and everyone is back in school, I’ve had to answer the bell and show up for work in person. I did it for the first time in a long time today, and I couldn’t have felt more out of place. I quickly realized how fortunate I was to spend all that time at home with my wife and kids, and that I wanted it back. The headaches were worth it (false; they didn’t cause me any headaches).

As folks settle into this school year, I may get a few more days with my sniffling kids that are like all of those days in 2020 we spent at home. I’ll be sure to soak them up. Before I know it, everyone else in the house will be enjoying their summer break. Then, they’ll be prepping for another year, and another year means I’ll have fewer days ahead to get silly with my kiddos.