For many people, the new year brings new hope, but perhaps this is hope delayed for a certain NBA team that plays in the Crypt in downtown L.A.. You know the team. It’s the underachieving squad with the aging roster, with the reckless gunslinger, the faux superstar who rocks his street clothes more often than his uniform, and, of course, the King. I’d call them the “Lakers”, but as of late they look more like the Fake Show.

Most Lakers fans didn’t expect this group to launch out of the gate at the beginning of the season. We knew it would take some time, but we were promised something better than what we’ve seen on the court the last month. Inconsistency was expected with such a lack of chemistry in a sport that moves like poetry when played at its highest level, spontaneous but synchronized enough to form a rhythm, like improvisational jazz. Everyone knows you need a good rapport with your team in order to achieve success at such competitive heights. The synergy needs to arrive via instinct when thinking is the afterthought behind reaction.

To my beloved Lakers, where the fuck izzit?

Cracking the schedule into January, it’s just not there for this 2021-2022 Lakers teams, one that will drift into the great abyss of forgettable lineups, like 2005, and 2006, and 2015, and many others. Not as many as, say, the Sacramento Kings, because we’re still talking about the Lakers, the upper crust of NBA franchises. Even in these modern times of Warriors’ dynasties and Suns’ youth movements and Jazz mayo ball, the Lakers brand still carries weight. However, the team just isn’t living up to the purple and gold standard.

So, what’s the fix?

Well, there isn’t one that will yield any immediate results. Everyone knows they don’t have anything other than a Talen Horton-Tucker to throw into a trade. They have no first-round draft picks until damn near the end of this decade, and some immovable parts in the form of Russell Westbrook’s humungous contract. Dude is a hardcore baller and leaves everything on the court every time he plays, but most of the time that is to the detriment of his team. Lakers fans who believed that things would be different for Russ once he put on the uni and got with Bron in a return home for the L.A. native were foolish. I was one of them.

The Lakers can’t move Russ, but I guess they should try. I have an unpopular opinion, one that I scoffed at months ago, but now I’ve picked up a different tune. Trade AD.

WHAT?

It’s not that crazy of an idea, though. You could move him more easily than Russ, right? He has more value, and he is a better basketball player (when he plays). Sure, the “street clothes” designation isn’t a good look for him, but let that be your problem. I’m tired of it being the Lakers problem.

That’s your guy, though.

Yeah, it is, and he helped bring the Lakers a title during a wild year when the franchise lost one of its most beloved players. That title, with the bubble and the four months and all the haters talking shit, was still a beautiful thing. Thank you to that team that won it. The victory was medicine for our wounded souls. Laker nation was hurting so deeply, and the 17th Larry O’Brien helped. Mamba was smiling from way up in the cosmos.

That was two seasons ago. That team was immediately disassembled in what seems now like a move born out of absolute hubris. LeBron’s. Pelinka’s. Maybe even Rich Paul’s. Ya’ll thought you could just bring in whoever the hell to run with, and maybe you could have done it a decade ago, Bron, but not anymore. Not when the pieces fit so poorly. Square pegs for round holes. Injuries didn’t help, and in hindsight, the 2020-2021 Lakers were a lot better than this team now. Shit, I kind of miss Kyle Kuzma disappointing me, like Odom 2.0. You should dominate, but instead you hesitate. I miss KCP and Alex Caruso, and the defense those two brought. They’re gone, winning basketball games for other teams now.

In this moment, a couple hours away from tip-off against the Minnesota Timberwolves, I wish some things were different for the Lakers, but that’s not how it works. The team they have now is who they are and likely the same version of what they’ll be at the end of the season when they are back in the play-in tournament.

Oh, don’t be so pessimistic, Nick. I thought you ‘bled purple and gold’.

Yeah, I do. That’s why it hurts to come to terms with the short-lived era of LeBron and the Lakers winning. Shit is over, and the team’s best shot of getting back to it will probably come after LeBron is gone, after Russ is gone, and after they trade AD. I’m circling 2026 for no specific reason other than it was the first date that came to mind. That’s when I see the Lakers being competitive again. Steph will probably be done in the Bay. The Suns will have (hopefully) had their little run end. Giannis should be on the back end of his prime, but he’s out there in Milwaukee. Can’t worry about it until the Finals. 2026 is looking like the year the Lakers finally turn shit around and return to form.

We went a decade between titles. Six or seven years isn’t too bad. Just be sure to hit me up then. Return to the archive, dig this article up, and give me my flowers.

Happy 2022!